Never a dull moment

Visions of a glorious, long holiday weekend in Michigan have been stamped to smithereens in the last 24 hours (and thus begins another dramatic post by yours truly). A friend from church offered to let the boys and I ride with her to Holland on Wednesday night, and I gladly took her up on that. The weekends here always fly by, so it's nice to take advantage of some extra time. The trip started off splendidly: the babies fell asleep, and the boys got to do some goofing around together and watched some Diego. About 15 minutes from my parents' house, Jeran suddenly got sick. It wasn't much at that point which was good, but as soon as we pulled in the driveway and opened the van door the floodgates opened. It was horrible. Praise the Lord (seriously) for an understanding friend and a mom who stays up late. :) They were huge helps. We got Jeran bathed and into bed, everything cleaned up, and all seemed well (except that J.J. slept with me, so every single noise he made woke me up). I chalked up the experience to overtiredness (we got in at 11) and possible carsickness. This morning he was back to normal, and we were looking forward to a morning at the beach. Uh, WRONG. It was totally overcast and cool, with threats of rain in the forecast. So there went that plan. The boys and I stayed around home instead and played, visited the park, etc. It really was fine. Until after nap time, when Jeran woke up not feeling well and spent the next hour vomiting. So much for carsickness. At this point plans with my in-laws went out the window since we did not want to pass on any potential germs to them (my lucky parents get to keep them all here!). As for tomorrow (and yes I'm complaining, but it's my blog, darn it!) lunch with friends and a haircut are off the agenda. What I hate more than all of my plans breaking (because I AM an anal-retentive planner, so I really hate that) is seeing my child sick. It's a really helpless feeling, and throwing up is nothing compared to what some parents have to watch their children go through. This experience has reminded me that health is something we grossly take for granted until we don't have it. So for now we'll just take this opportunity God has given us to SLOW DOWN and take it easy and be thankful that we still have the chance to be in Michigan with family and friends (even though most of them will be avoiding us due to the looming threat of a flu virus - not that I blame them).

New perspective

Wow - I'm not sure what brought about such a meltdown yesterday, but I'm going to go ahead and chalk it up to [whispering] "that time of the month". Today I feel much better about the whole situation, in no small part due to all of the encouragement and advice I have received. I am feeling much more laid back about the whole thing, as I think I had my expectations set WAY too high to begin with. We're definitely going to keep at it but not expect anything miraculous to happen real soon. Today has been a much better day as far as Jeran's compliance with trying and his success as well. Not sure if my attitude or his achievment is the chicken coming first or the egg but no matter. All is well for the time being.

Potty training, day....blech..whatever

So I really feel like a crazy person. I don't know what's going on with me. I cannot understand why I'm such an emotional basketcase over this stupid potty training. Am I expecting too much? Probably. I guess I'm just ready to throw in the towel on the whole thing b/c I feel like out of Jeran and I, I am the only one who is remotely interested in this whole venture. Whatever gains I thought I was seeing in the last 2 days are nil today. It's a fight to get him to even sit on the potty much less to stay there. He could care less if he pees on it; in fact, when it happens it seems merely to be an accident. He'll look "down there" kind of surprised like. He's equally content to go to the bathroom in his Pull-Up or even underwear the few times I have tried that. If my timing isn't exact we'll miss the potty and he's gone in the Pull-Up. In fact, when we got home from errands this morning I set the timer for 3 minutes until "potty time" and within that short time he went! My thoughts are consumed with these thoughts (and these thoughts only, which is probably why I'm feeling so nuts): "How long since Jeran was last on the potty? Does he need to go? Did he ALREADY go? Is he still dry? I need to ask him if he's still dry. How long should I make him sit on the potty? Is it worth him screaming and crying b/c he doesn't WANT to sit on the potty?" and then they start all over again. I have a headache. I am turning into a very ugly person with a hair-trigger temper. It does not seem worth it, and I'm stuck between thinking I should just try again in a couple weeks and being worried that I'm giving up too soon. I know this: I'm definitely outta this prison called my house after the boys are in bed tonight. I think I'll go check out that mental health facility in Tinley Park. Oh darn, they closed down. Hmmm...I guess it'll be Starbucks then.

Day 2...

...of our bathroom adventures has drawn to a close. I'm beat, that's all I can say. Being so hyper-vigilant about making sure J.J. gets his toilet time is no easy task (or maybe I just make it complicated - it's been known to happen). Here's the brief synopsis, which is all I have energy to relive at the moment: there is some headway being made, but it's definitely an uphill battle. And while making our way up this hill we are encountering heavy, blasting winds, large boulders, and slippery slopes (not that I'm melodramatic about the whole situation AT ALL), so there have been a few backward motions along with any ground we have gained. I made the mistake today of switching up the "treats" given for staying dry, so I think he became slightly less motivated, but there were a lot of good moments today too. We just gotta keep pressing on...

Speaking of bathroom adventures, we have an unexpected bathroom project happening this weekend (GREAT timing, I know). Our "guest" bathroom, for lack of a better term, has seen its share of tsunamis created by, you guessed it, the 3-year-old storm known as Jeran. While you might imagine (as I did) that bathrooms are generally built to hold up to some moisture damage (or downright drenching) we find, as with so many other things in our home, that things are built, how should I put it, shoddily. In two of the corners yesterday morning we noticed (gulp) mold starting to grow. (At this point everyone is just clamoring to come over to our house, I know: a moldy bathroom and not-quite-toilet-trained three-year-old? Bring on the fun!). Upon taking off some of the trim and a corner of the flooring, James discovered that everything was VERY wet. This ugly phenomenon continued the more floor he took up. It is, in a word, gross. I'm thankful we discovered this problem before it could get out of hand, but it now creates some definite work for my hubby (much to his chagrin). We just are not project people (probably much to my parents' chagrin, as they always had a household project going on while I was growing up, at least to my recollection. You would think the love for it would rub off). We're pretty ready to be done doing things to this house. On the other hand, the bathroom was in sore need of some sort of updating, so I suppose it's a blessing in disguise. Also, it can't hurt our resale value come time to unload it...uh, sell I mean.

I am HORRIBLE at taking before and after pictures but have at least bumped up a notch to remembering mid-project. SO - just for kicks, here's where things stand now:

Hopefully it's obvious that we don't normally have a toilet in our tub. And look at this close-up of the LOVELY tiling we found underneath the current stuff. Who knew?

And where is Benj in the midst of all the madness? Being his cute, jovial self and kickin' that skill of sitting up in the heinie:

Could this be the start of his love affair with books? If J.J. and I have anything to say about it, you betcha!

Potty training...Day 1

To begin with, I have always understood that teaching a child to leave his diapers behind in lieu of the loo (ha ha - couldn't resist) was a big deal for the parents and have shown what I believe to be the appropriate amount of excitement over each accomplishment that was brought to my attention. With that said, as with many other things in the parenting realm, I never REALLY "got it" until I was walking in those potty-obsessed shoes.
Louwerse Operation "pee on pot" is slow going thus far, and I will admit it already has me frustrated. The rational part of me knows it is ridiculous to get beaten down after one morning. The sick-of-changing-diapers part of me was really hoping this would just be a raging success from the get go. It seems to come down to the fact that he CAN go where he's supposed to but really doesn't want to. And I'm not sure what to do with that. Not that it doesn't fit his personality - Mr. Strong-Willed. A friend loaned me the book Potty Training 1-2-3 and the basic premise is that the child gets rewarded for keeping his diaper dry, not actually going on the potty. The whole point is to keep the diaper dry. So we check his diaper every 15 mins. or so, and if he's dry he gets a treat (today it's Cheetos - brilliant move, Mom. On top of everything else I have to be vigilant about avoiding cheesy fingerprints everywhere). If he actually goes in the pot he gets a DOUBLE treat and lots of praise (Cheetos AND peanut M&Ms. Ok, I'll admit it, I keep sneaking some of the treats too. I deserve it!). So this went relatively well. After about an hour and a half he actually went in the desired spot - hooray! We ecstatically ate our Cheetos and M&Ms and called Daddy at work who also doled out lots of congrats and "phone - fives". Later on my enthusiasm crashed when I realized he was going in little bits, then waiting until the Pull-Up was back on to really let 'er loose. Grrr.... I have continued with this process, however, as I don't want to be a quitter in the first 3 hours of this task. However, feigning joyous fervor over a dry diaper only to find it filled a few minutes after getting off the potty is wearing me down. I'm thinking when he gets up from nap time (with a full Pull-Up, no doubt) it will be time to just switch to underwear so he doesn't have the safety net. In which case I will need to guard our new couches with my life and imprison J.J. in one area of the house, preferably one with pee-proof flooring. Sigh - I KNOW we will get there. This is just a different type of milestone to hit because it requires patient and consistent TEACHING. With things like crawling, walking, talking, although we did some instructing, for the most part he just got there when he was good and ready. Maybe that's the exact advice I need to take to heart just now.
We are open to thoughts/suggestions/encouragement/tough love.....bring it on. In the meantime if you need me I'll be in the...well, you know.

Summer...already winding down

Even though summer is working it's way to a close (if the thought makes you panic a bit, keep in mind fall does not OFFICIALLY begin until September 22 - phew), it's a very different feeling this year with not returning to full time teaching. There is some sadness about not being with my fellow teachers but no regret on my part about that. It means more time with my boys and prolonged summertime fun. And less money. But I'm trying not to dwell on that part. Much. (Philippians 4:13 for Pete's sake!)

We enjoyed a fun-filled family weekend. Weekend aside for a moment, I just have to say how much James and I are LOVING our new, low-key life. We had run so hard and fast for so long with all of our commitments that it is just a magical time right now for us to realize we have virtually nothing dictating our evenings and weekends. It's been a great thing for our family unit. Anyway, the weekend.....Friday night we enjoyed a backyard campfire. When we can't get out for the real thing (and let's face it, with a three-and-a-half-year-old and an 8 month old, well, we're just not that brave) it's a pretty nice substitute. Saturday was breakfast and a brief shopping trip at one of our very favorite places...IKEA. You cannot beat feeding the entire family for five bucks and then browsing countless home items that you really don't need but are still incredibly cool. In the afternoon we got to experience the phenomenon that is Go Fish. This musical group is made up of 3 very wacky guys who record Christian kids' music, basically. But their motto (and I tend to think they've accomplished it after seeing them Sat.) is that they make music for kids that won't drive their parents bonkers. :) Despite the fact that I think James ended up being embarrassed to be seen with me, we all had a great time and the event presented Jeran and I with some new music to listen to in the car (since he tends to get stuck on one CD for a looooong time).

Ben says, Whoa! That's loud!

Jeran, getting in to the excitement, with

his buddy, Ellie.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Wkc9-SvqfDM

Because I have no clue how to upload a YouTube video here (if you have insight please share) here's the link to my favorite song of theirs thus far: The Mom Song.

Yesterday we enjoyed our day of worship and rest (for James that included fishing :) ).

This morning the boys and I made it to a splash park which was the perfect activity with the temperatures on the rise again. We'll most likely hit it another time this week since both boys liked it so immensely. So as you can see, we continue to let the good times roll and enjoy each blessed day we are granted.

Jeran was not interested so much in the water at first as the train they had there....shocking.

Ben, however, found the water entrancing.

Disgusted

Please allow me to vent for one brief moment here about the state of the parks in our fair town here. Not only have I discovered various forms of garbage on the playgrounds, as one might expect, I have also found open condom wrappers, detonated fireworks, and today I can add to the list....doggie poopie. Yes, that's right...canine crap. Not so unusual, you claim? How about...placed smack dab in the middle of the stairs at the top of a slide. Yeah, nice.....
This morning on our walk we passed one of several parks in our area, so I let Jeran loose for a few minutes. He climbed to the top of the equipment and I heard him utter, "Uh-oh" but didn't think much of it. A few minutes later he said, "Mommy, wanna climb with me?" Sure, why not? As we're heading up the steps he says, "Oo, I smell something, Mom."
"Really, J? What?"
"It smells like poop."
I suddenly realized I could smell it too, and as we rounded the top landing...bam. There it was. I am hard pressed to believe that some dog unintentionally found his way to the top of a kids' play area and was suddenly seized with the urge to do his duty. This really seems like a clear-cut case of teenage vagrancy. I guess that's just the old-fogey in me who's tired of seeing teens hanging out where her kids like to play and stumbling across the evidence of their thrill-seeking the following morning. To be fair, though, I do remember being a teen at one time and upon several occasions finding myself hanging out a playground. What is the irresistable pull to "hang" at such a place? Who knows? I can't reach back in my memory that far.
As the concerned citizen that I am, I had good intentions of calling up the park district when I got home to report the poop, but as I sit here 12 hours later I realize it never happened.

Storms

Phew! Wow...well, what an evening of excitement! I was at the library, minding my own business, engrossed in People magazine (it's amazing what one can get into for a brief time of peace and quiet), when I heard the librarians commenting about how nasty it was getting outside. What?! Time to scoot home. No sooner had I gotten back than the tornado sirens went off - a sound that unleashes a tingle of fear down to my very toenails. So of course I immediately panicked and ran to the boys' room (ok, in my defense, it was not really a run - more like a very speedy walk). They were both still awake, so I grabbed them and brought them - where? We don't have a basement and no real "interior" room. I thought I remembered reading something about a bathtub in this case? So I brought the boys into the bathtub with me (ha ha, yes, I know, I can hear you laughing). James, meanwhile, was keeping tabs on the weather and telling me to not overreact. Dear man. He is always working to keep me calm in these situations. During the night on a camping trip to Maine we once heard a wolf/coyote howling, and he assured me it was an owl. I chose to believe him. Anyway, I digress... My reply to my very calm hubby was, "The TORNADO sirens are going off! When exactly should I overreact? When the roof is coming off?!" So we sat in the bathtub, the four of us, James frequently leaving to check the weather and look out windows - aren't both of those major no-no's during a tornado warning? No more so than sitting in a bathtub I suppose. Jeran and Ben thought it was a GRAND adventure, making each other laugh hysterically which made me laugh which was exactly the medicine I needed at that moment. After a few tense moments and lots of prayer, the danger (such as it was) has subsided. And so I close with a spectacular lightning display out my window and the symphonic sounds of my overtired boys' cries filling the house. Ah, summer......

Summer....continued

I looked at the calendar today and found myself wondering where the heck today WAS, and then I realized we've switched over to August! Egads! We've been enjoying summer immensely here. It's been relatively mild, which I'm thankful for since I'm a wuss in the heat. We've made another zoo trip, with several more in the works, spent time in the backyard, concentrating mostly on the mini-pool, visited with friends (most recently our beloved Kris and her new baby, Cole - what a sweet pea!), swam at the pool with Steph and Holland, taken walks, played at the park, stopped at the library .....so - although not wild and crazy, very enjoyable to us. The boys also lucked out and got to spend an entire weekend with Nana here at the house while James and I ventured out on our annual camping trip with "the gang". All I can say is - fabulous food, friends, campfire, and a pontoon boat on a sunny Saturday. Good times.

Ben grows more and more animated with each passing week. He is extremely vocal: squealing, laughing, babbling, and ALWAYS moving. He's constantly reaching for and grabbing anything in sight and remotely within reach. If it's not within his reach he engages his newly acquired skill of getting his "roll" on. He's just ITCHING to go places. You can almost see that in his mind he's speed-walking around the house, but his 8-month-old body is hindering him. By moving tummy to back,though, he's starting to get places which makes mommy more vigilant about what toys are laying around. He also loves to gnaw the living daylights out of whatever object is unfortunate enough to find itself in his grasp. It is absolutely glorious to watch, and I feel like I can actually see his mind turning things over, working things out, etc. With a little bit of support yet, the Benj is also doing some pretty strong sitting. Currently he has stalled at two teeth, but that's good enough for us.

Jeran. What can I say about Jeran? He is my firstborn, strong-willed, stubborn child. In a word, he's: me. I feel I so easily fall into the trap of being negative where he's concerned. It's true that in recent weeks I feel we've regressed about a year and a half back, behavior-wise, experiencing fits, tantrums, and defiance that have not been seen in this house to this degree for many many months. It's also true that he's all boy: loud, busy, destructive. But there are also the facets of his personality that I love and treasure with all my heart: his boundless energy (when connoted negatively - busy, I guess), his enthusiastic love, his outgoing joy, his curiosity, playfulness, numerous hugs and kisses, cheezy smile, giggles (especially when they are directed at Ben and cause him to laugh too). From the very beginning I vowed to cherish every moment with him, even the hard ones. And that was an easy promise to make to myself when his adorable infant self occupied most of our time with sleeping. Now, when the rubber meets the road, I want to remember that in the blink of an eye, he'll be graduating high school and embarking on his own road of life, and I want no regrets when that moment hits.

Anyway.....I feel so blessed to be having this summertime with him (two days a week of tutoring notwithstanding) and even more blessed that I will not be returning to full time teaching come the fall so that our summertime can linger on. Today we've had a great morning of romping outside in the sprinkler and attending an outdoor "concert", with music provided by Jeran himself. An eclectic mix of tunes including but not limited to "Old MacDonald" and one of Vivaldi's "Four Seasons" (which he heard on one of Ben's toys). He's had SUCH a hard time entertaining himself lately for some reason, but the rest of his morning has been spent building with his train tracks and blocks and coming up with little scenarios involving his trains and cars. It's been so fun to listen to him using his imagination, and it has allowed me some one-on-one time with Ben which doesn't often happen.

One other interesting factoid about Jeran: we have officially entered into the time of "why"? "Because why"? is something we hear following any instructions/requests/demands/explanations that we give. The challenge I'm finding is to give more creative answers than "Because I said so".

By the way, his week of VBS was great!! The end of the week program? Hilarious followed by mortifying. The photo below is the only one I got of him clearly visible and standing still. He was a terror! Climbing the front stage steps and jumping off, over and over; running back and forth across the stage, with some singing and dancing thrown in. I finally just yanked him off since it quickly turned into the Jeran show rather than a program meant to display what the kids had learned about Christ that week. Whoops. Clearly too young for that sort of thing yet. Live and learn.

Jeran is the second kid to the left in the bottom row, next to the cute blond with the sundress.