School's In!

And just like that, a new school year begins.



This day never ceases to fill me with conflicting emotions. There's some grief at the marching on of time that each new year represents. You might see the boy in the photo above.  I, however, see this:

At the same time, I wish I could say I wasn't that mom who eagerly awaits the start of school by the time August hits.  I WISH I could say that. But I am a creature of habit and loves me a schedule and routine. While we had an incredible summer filled with park visits, swimming, baseball games, family, friends, and leisure in abundance, it was with great excitement that we welcomed today. For Jeran (and, let's face it, for Mom too) there were still a few nerves about what to expect from second grade, its teacher, and its classmates. But they have significantly decreased compared to the last couple of years. You know, whatev, we've got the school thing down. 

It was with such pride that I left him this morning, watching him work the line for Room 107, greeting old and new friends alike.  I lingered in the background, shuffling away by inches, recognizing how much more rare these glimpses into his school self will become.

I thought I might tear up for a minute, then I considered dancing away in glee. But I settled for a backward glance and a smile, then contentedly turned for home with two more babies clinging to my hands.

Magic Show

ACT ONE:
Ben: Pick a card (closes eyes)
Jeran: Ok
Ben: Did you pick a three?
Jeran: No
Ben: Did you pick a four?
Jeran: No
Ben: Did you pick a two?
Jeran: No
Ben: Did you pick an eight?
Jeran: No
Ben: Did you pick a six?
Jeran: YES!
Both boys: WHOAAAAAAA! 

ACT TWO:
Jeran: Ok, Mom, I am going to make a bag of pennies magically appear! (waves wand)  Abra cadabra! (Hands grope in pants then emerge triumphantly) See??

The Wrap-up...or is it just the beginning?

So, where do we go from here?
Last week was (I believe I've overused this word in my descriptions of it) amazing. A whole different life. One that really didn't cause major upset.  I'll admit that I've been nervous to enter back into "real life", and if I may grossly stretch the analogy, I believe I can relate in some miniscule way to addicts as they have to enter back into their life from "before".  I don't want us to revert back to old habits.  What we have put into place to try and avoid that scenario is this:
1) The boys are now limited to two hours of screen time per day.  One hour in the morning, one hour in the afternoon/evening, and this can only occur after they've completed some responsibilities that we've set out for them (in the morning this involves but is not limited to getting dressed, brushing teeth, some family prayer/devotional time, etc.; in the afternoon, doing some reading).  Today this went...bleh, not to put too fine a point on it. I think it's just a matter of suffering from fun-weekend-hangover and then trying to adjust to yet another new "thing" that mom and dad have come up with. But I'm confident we'll get there.
2) We will be getting rid of our cable, to the extent that only the major networks will be left to us. This will seriously limit choices. We do have Netflix, so there's still that to contend with.  If we find our family is not wise with it we can always give that the boot too.
3) I am going to loosely keep the schedule I was adhering to last week as far as my own internet shenanigans.  Probably a half hour in the morning and evening and then an hour or so in the afternoon for work-type things.
4) James and I have decided we will no longer be "flippers" in the evening, aimlessly scrolling through channels and watching things that have zero interest to us.  We'll only watch if there's something on that we truly want to see.

Hopefully having some structured guidlines, a plan - if you will, can assist us in keeping this monkey off our backs. When school starts we may even amend some of these measures further.
I feel proud that we've done something good for our family, something healthy for our minds and spirits. It inspires me to put some other things in motion for me/us, but I'm not really ready to throw those out there yet.  COWARD!  I know.  For those of you have followed our experiment and who have checked in with us or offered words of encouragement, thank you.  You played a huge part in our success because just knowing that this had the potential for being followed by others kept me accountable.
In other news, Michigan was FAB-U-LOUS. Family fun at its best. A few pics of the good times rollin'.


Family pics are over.  Let the dirt-digging commence!




The Louwerse ladies - takin' over Saugatuck!



Cousins and Big Red

It's Thursday?!

Guys, don't hate on me, but I just don't really have anything different to say here.  I think we my have found pretty darn close to a new way of life.  We do NOT miss our television.  We just don't. Is that to say that I will never watch again? Psshhhh, no. I think part of the reason we don't miss it is because we know this is temporary. HOWEVER.  Never again do I desire to go back to the land of the couch potato where we were previously residing.  There is a lightness and peace that has returned to our home or that maybe is here for the first time, really.  In my first post I mentioned the general unrest that had permeated our existence, and now it's like a fog has lifted.  It feels really corny to say this, but this week has truly been life-changing.
Hm, that's kinda sad.
I guess it's just evidence of how much of a grip these things have had on our lives without us realizing it.
A new realization today: I have not given my children enough credit.  It's me who defaults to the television as entertainment.  I try to head off any interruptions to my agenda at the pass by plunking them down in front of the electronic babysitter. They have shown me this week that they are MORE than capable of finding ways to enjoy life without the screen and have proven to me that when I do have to attend to matters other than them (ie: cleaning the house, which I was actually able to do today without the aid of the Power Rangers), they can handle it out of their own imagination.
I've been mulling over ways that we can make some of these changes stick as the week has gone on.  I'll spell some of those out here in coming days.  Tomorrow we head to Michigan for some fun family time.  James's family/siblings has not been together as one unit in, if my calculations are correct, about six years. So we are beyond excited for the good times that are ahead of us. Certainly better than anything MTV, Food Network, or G.I. Joe could entice us with.
Have a great weekend, y'all.

Day 2

Remember yesterday when I said that my children were relatively unfazed by the amount of time remaining in our screenless week?  Sometime this afternoon Ben decided that five days left was SIGNIFICANT.  Yes, we had our first meltdown this afternoon. However, it was short (especially for Ben who is a marathon whiner), and he quickly went back to business as usual.  I'm not complaining. I had myself geared up for constant requests and complaints this week, and they just haven't happened. I continue to be amazed.
Today involved a trip to the local splash park with some neighborhood friends, and it was definitely helpful to get outta the house for awhile, but the remainder of the day the boys were once again more than satisfied to entertain themselves and each other here at home.  A few hairy moments ensued around dinner time, and that's not unusual.  For whatever reason, that is the time of day at our house when all the crazies come out.  Usually there is much yelling (on both my and the kids' part) and general unproductive attempts at stamping out the fires.  Today I took a deep breath instead and dug into my dollar section back-up plans so that the rest of our time before din-din looked like this:


Thank you, Target.
(Notice the bat on the table. This was NOT being used productively five minutes prior to this photo.)


I realized today how much we've been operating on autopilot (at least, speaking for myself and I think for my better half too). But in the past 48 hours I feel like we've truly been interacting with each other and not just coexisting.  We're eating meals as a family, sharing time together in the evening (rather than the mad rush to just GET THOSE KIDS IN BED ALREADY!), and really observing what's happening with one another. And we're making room.  Room for conversation, connection, creativity (this grammar nerd just LOVES alliteration).  Room for God to speak and to direct our activities.
Nothing's perfect around here, by any means.  But I can't help but speak positively about what's happening so far.  I kind of feel like I just showed up to my own life (is that a song?). I have renewed energy, renewed love for my children, renewed interest in taking an active role in who they're becoming.
What else did I learn about myself today?  I have learned that I have a huge sense of urgency when it comes to communication/information.  I constantly found myself gripped by, "I need to look up that info on the internet RIGHT NOW!" or "That email needs to be written and sent RIGHT NOW!"  And it just isn't so.  One goal I have for myself when we return to "normal" next week is to continue to limit my computer activity to just a couple of specific times during the day.  Minutes and hours rapidly get sucked up when I give myself constant access and free reign, and those minutes and hours I'd rather give to the people in my life.
Speaking of people, I spent the loveliest evening with a special group of women in my life. We started out (the original group, anyway) sharing a career (educating) and a love for reading, and throughout the past nine years have also shared in coming mothers and raising our babies, changing homes, morphing life roles. Some moved on from the group, others entered in, but they are all incredible ladies, and I'm blessed to know them and continue sharing stories, both read and lived. Thanks for the laughter this evening, ladies, and for filling my night with REAL entertainment, not the screen-confined kind.

Day 1

Let me just say that the best way to start your first day of complete separation from all forms of alternative entertainment is NOT to lose three hours of sleep the night before to a screaming migraine. Strike one.  My lofty goal was to awaken before the children this morning (and you've gotta be up MIGHTY early to beat those boys to the punch).  Instead, my barely coherent, slightly comatose self was only remotely cognizant of the fact that they were up and at 'em around 6:30.  This is generally the first time t.v./computer is used in our day (since, let's face it, most mornings find me barely coherent and slightly comatose).  In my twilight-minded state I remember Jeran coming in to ask where the remote was (I had hidden it the night before). After being reminded that this was day one of our no-t.v. adventure, he merely shrugged and went to haul out his Legos.
This reaction was enough to cause one of my eyelids to sloooooooowly open.  Perhaps there was hope for the day after all!!!
Truly, it was an amazing day.  I could not have asked for things to have gone better on day one. Only one other time in the entire day did the boys even ask about their missing screens (Benj asked after his nap how many days were left and seemed relatively undaunted by the number six).  I really am so proud of my boys as I reflect on the past 14 hours.  They are 100% all in on this challenge and were pretty much unfazed by it all. I didn't do too bad myself. A little work this afternoon, a little blogging now, and I've stayed within my hour and a half internet limit for myself. Mostly.
It seems like such a silly thing, giving up t.v. and computer usage for the week.  I feel like I'm making such a big deal over something so minor.  But it IS a big deal. I can see after just one day how much these things taken over our lives, our brain function, our family time. It was SUCH a good day.  I haven't ended a day feeling this good as a parent and a person in so long I can't even tell you.  It's refreshing. 
With that said, I could be singing a totally different tune come Wednesday.

Fort building busts any boredom

What are these we've found in our house?  Toys?!

This is such a terrible picture - I apologize.  Jeran was a little bit at a loss how to spend his last few moments before bed, and James suggested he go chat up our friendly neighbor across the street.  So he did. :) 

The Plan, such as it is

First of all, please do not take my last post as my commentary on media/humanity in general or you/your family specifically.  This whole thing is merely about what's happening in my home and family and what's not working for us anymore. I certainly don't want to be the cause of any offense or give off the vibe that all technology is evil. Ok, disclaimer over.
Thanks so much to those of you, both here and on Facebook, who have chimed in with encouragement and advice. I am equal parts excited and terrified about this endeavor. Since I decided with certainty to pursue this I just feel all sorts of confirmation and get it repeatedly (based on behavior around here) that it's going to be the right thing. But it's going to be dang hard.
I can already see that the temptation for me will be to run us ragged with activity. But that kind of defeats the purpose of what I want to accomplish.  I want to take the focus off of DOING and just BE.  I want to experience peace in our home and a slowing down. My mantra for the week shall be, "I am not the cruise director!!"
The times that I rely most on the television to entertain my brood is first thing in the morning and during dinner-makin' time. So I can be certain that these will be the moments in which I'll face the greatest temptation.  If I'm going to be brutally honest, anytime I have an agenda is when I most rely on that thing to babysit for me. I've been arming myself for moments in which an activity is needed with a few goodies at the dollar section in Target and by perusing websites where other brave souls before me have pondered alternatives to the t.v.
Another great temptation for me, personally, is going to be logging off Facebook for the week and not checking email the SECOND I'm alerted by my phone. I do use the internet for work, so I've allotted myself an hour and a half a day to handle any work matters (I know, I'm totally spoiled with a flexible at-home job)/respond to emails/blog about our misadventures. Other than that, the laptop and my phone will be tucked away. I will feel very lonely as these devices connect me to a world in which my name isn't "Mom".
SO.  The experiment begins tomorrow. Feel free to follow along here if you wish, as a witness to our triumphs and, perhaps, epic failures.  My prayer is that I'll be open to all sorts of thing God wants to show me, not the least of which is that the t.v. really doesn't have to be the supreme ruler.