Vacation Rules

This was pretty much my mantra for the last two weeks. After loading down Minnie the Van with what seemed to me like all of our worldly belongings (sans the proverbial kitchen sink) the boys and I took off for Michigan. We headed up before James as he was going to ditch us for a golfing excursion over the weekend first, so our first week of vaca was without him, and I’ll be honest that a vacation from my hubby is no vacation. But we filled up our time with fun excursions, hanging with family and catching up with friends we do not often get to see during our whirlwind stops in the Hometown. We playdated, ate donuts, fed carrots to horses, watched TV (more than 10 channels- worth!!), frolicked on the beach, drank fruity drinks (OJ for the boys, other fun stuff in the evening for Mom with friends), ate lots of great food, celebrated an earned degree of higher learning (way to go, Meliss!), etc. etc.
Upon James’s return to us we promptly ditched the children (with heavy hearts, of COURSE) and enjoyed three blissful days of adults-only time at a cottage near the lake (thanks to Mom L. for hooking us up with that one!). Here is why adult vacation R-U-L-E-S:
- I did not watch anything of any redeeming value (ok, that’s not totally true. There was a LOT of Food Network). My newly discovered favorite show is VH-1′s “You’re Cut Off”. Hilarious! And slightly troubling.
- I read an entire magazine (again, with little redeeming value) in one sitting.
- Every single meal was eaten at my pace, at an enjoyable and appropriate temperature, without interruption.
- I went to the beach twice and only got up to swim.
- I arose out of bed after 9 a.m.
- I had no schedule or agenda of any kind. I only checked the time out of sheer habit.
- I actually had the chance to miss my kids.
- I interacted with my husband beyond, “What time will you be home?” “Can you get (insert child’s name here) more (insert edible item here)?” “Your turn for baths.”
- There was mental energy to spare! I was able to reflect on more than just what the next meal, disciplinary action, or necessary chore would be.

I really don’t mean to give off the impression that I dislike being with my children. It’s just that they are so ALL-consuming, and I didn’t even fully realize how much so until all of that came to a complete stop. It was a much-needed and much-appreciated time with just my hubs.

The remainder of the week was spent having loads of fun with the kids, first at Auntie Rach’s house in GR where we visited the zoo, Millenium Park (a playground/beach/splash pad extravaganza on the outskirts of the city), and the children’s museum. The rest of the weekend was spent boating and beaching it with friends, hanging with the girls-only (as well as Anthony the flirtatious waiter, Edward, and Jacob), attending a fireworks display with a few of our VERY favorite people (followed by a really hard good-bye), and several fantastic hours spent with friends over a delicious dinner followed by a backyard fireworks show. The only downside to this vacation was the following list of things we missed: Robyn and Russ’, my BFF from the ‘hood and one of my favorite comfort-food joints.

It was harsh coming home, I gotta tell ya, but at the same time I think it’s these amazing times away that make you feel like your real life is pretty amazing too.

Healthy, Wealthy, and Wise....well, one outta three ain't bad

If you're a regular reader here at the ol' blog you may recall that a couple months ago some friends and I set some goals to a healthier us. You can refresh your memory on that here . Speaking for my personal goals, well, I coulda done better. The snacking after dinner habit is a thing of the past and was actually not all that difficult to give up, surprisingly. As for something as simple as drinking enough water in a day, I have been ridiculously lazy about that. I don't know WHY that should be so tough for me, but I still just don't get enough into my system. I think what would really be helpful is just investing in a Camelbak so that it's on my person all day long. The exercise portion of the goals has been nil. Unless you count chasing after 3 young children all day long. And I do. But I know it's not enough.
Tonight I got up my gumption and went for my first run (of what I hope is many). I finally began to understand my runner friends. It felt AMAZING to be outdoors doing something so good for myself. I was pathetically tired by the end, but it's a start! I'm using the Couch Potato to 5K program so what's even MORE pathetic is that I didn't even run for more than a minute at a time. For the first couple run/walk cycles I was all, "What? I could do this all DAY, punk!" and by the end I was all, *wheeze*- *cough*- *sweat*. (Ok that's a slight exaggeration but only slight.) However, I definitely had a small sense of that euphoria and adrenaline, and I'm excited to see how long I can keep it up! Speaking optimistically, hopefully it's the start of a healthier new me. Stay tuned.
So to recap: one out of three health goals accomplished. For now I'm going to stick to just two and try to whip into shape my drinking and exercising habits. So check back in 6 weeks to see how Julie is doing on:
A) Drinking approx. 64 oz of H2O per day &
B) Exercising 4 x/week

A Love Story

In honor of my 12th wedding anniversary (which today marks, incidentally) I thought I would present to you...our story.

Rewind all the way back to 1989. 6th grade. James's and my elementary schools merged into one junior high, and thus began our history. While James really didn't even know I existed (a fact about which I like to give him endless grief), the hottie across the orchestra room (sorry, honey, it's out now. Yes, my man did, indeed, play the cello) was not lost on me. I harbored a crush on the cello-playing, spectacle-sporting cutie who didn't know I existed through the ensuing years, and at our 8th grade skating party I finally worked up the nerve to ask him to, you guessed it, skate. But lo, it was not yet to be. Out on the glossy rink was my crush, hands linked with another 8th grade female (whom I immediately loathed). Fast forward to the spring of our sophomore year. Thanks to our typing class seating arrangement (yes typing! We were the last class not to have computers) a whole lotta flirting started going on (ie: jabs made at my excessive need for the correction fluid). And finally (no, really, FINALLY - the following FALL), thanks to some help from my BFF, Robyn, James asked me out. And ever thereafter we were an "item". High school sweethearts. Aside from a couple of kinda laughable breakups (is it really considered a breakup when it lasts for 2 days and you talk on the phone that entire time?).

We did the whole long distance thing for a year and a half in college, after which time I threw in the towel on THAT whole deal and transferred to Trinity.

On August 8, before our junior year, James took me on a dinner cruise aboard the "Spirit of Chicago". As I had been putting on the pressure pretty heavily to get married (and truly, what a testament to the love of my guy that he would put up with an 18-year-old girlfriend whining about getting MARRIED! It really is absurd when I see it in print like that), I felt confident that this was THE big night - the proposal! The romance was a bit squelched as we had to share our table with another couple, but, not to be deterred, I took every opportunity to pull James onto the upper deck so he would not have to miss his opportunity! However, as we docked back at Navy Pier I came to the disappointing, nay, devastating realization that no ring would be placed upon my finger that night. Dejected, I allowed my boyfriend to lead me back through the streets of Chicago to our waiting vehicle. So disheartened was I, that I was taken completely off-guard when he stopped in front of a horse and carriage and secured us a ride! My brain clouded by shock, I honestly didn't even see it coming (but you do, don't you?) - the proposal. Simple and perfect. Beneath the moon (and skyscraper) - lit skies. A ring on my finger. The words: "I love you. Will you marry me?" (I should point out here that James was pretty darn proud of himself at this moment. Due to the aforementioned incessant marriage talk he wasn't sure he could pull off any sort of surprise on my part.)

We wed in June of 1998, and what a celebration it was! Nearly 10 years in the making for me. :) Admittedly, I have the worst memory of almost anyone I know, but I clearly remember the joy I felt that day. Not just over marrying my love and best friend but also for having so many friends and family around us with which to celebrate. We were young, yes, and have had a lot to learn, OH yes. But when I look back and see how much we have grown and how God has matured us, and having shared that with one another, well, I can say without hesitation that I love James more today than I ever could have imagined loving him 12 years ago. I won't say there haven't been rough or painful moments, but in large part we have been spared from tragedy and heartbreak. Which, in this life, means that it's still coming - that's not pessimism, it's just real. But who better to face those moments with than the man who has already been a part of every great joy I've experienced in the past 17 years? Not to mention with the God who brought him to me. I am filled with both fear and excitement at what the future holds for our family. And when I look back over the history we have already, it's largely excitement. And gratitude for what's behind AND ahead.

(Side note: We realized that this year, including our years spent dating, we have known each other over half our lives. Yowza.)

The Haps

I consider summer officially here because A) It's been freaking HOT this whole week! Therefore we've broken out the kiddie pool and slip 'n slide. And B) Jeran celebrated (bittersweetly) his last day of preschool today. My dear, generous friend, Amy, drove on down with her girls to watch Ben and Gray so I could attend Jeran's last-day picnic. I sat watching him run around, all hot and sweaty, yelling and laughing and pretending with his friends, amazed that he has reached this milestone. Now, I grant you, it's no PhD in psychology (props to my bro-in-law, Keith, for that ENORMOUS milestone!), but it has been an important year of growth for him in all ways: physically, academically, developmentally, socially. We've seen a lot of incredible changes in him, and his teachers have been instrumental in that. So I was really sad to close this chapter and say good-bye. (Jeran was too, but I think it will hit him later. He was a little bit too anxious to get to D.Q. for his promised celebratory ice cream to really get sad in the moment.) Kindergarten looms, and as I use such an ominous-sounding word as looms to describe what really should be an exciting, as well as customary and not unexpected next step, I start to realize how averse to change I really am. And it would appear I am starting to project that onto my children as well. I want them to embrace where God is leading, not cower from it. But that's a tall order for me, so it can be difficult to teach my kids.
For now, we have an entire summer of fun, fun, fun to look forward to.

Ben, dear Ben. Still into everything and anything. Laughing all the time (except for those times he's screaming in that banshee-esque, two-year-old fashion when he is told no, is frustrated, isn't allowed to do things himself, or is pestered by his older brother). He displays more and more of Jeran's openness with people, even moreso than Jeran at times. He is not content to leave a store unless the sales clerk (and anyone else in a 10-foot radius) has given him an enthusiastic response to his "hi" and "bye". He is mischievous and curious and adorable with a capital A.

Grayson is dangerously and excitingly close to walking! Personally, I vote for the walking with this one. I just think summer will be SOOOO much easier if he's got that skill under his belt. JJ and Ben LOVE to be outdoors (and I've got the sunburn to prove it), and it would just make my life a tad easier not to have to concern myself with concrete burns on the knees or with what inedible object is going into his mouth next. Like his bros, he is a happy, carefree, generally social and smiling boy. I say boy, not baby. Despite his round, bald, adorably shiny head (challenged in the area of hair growth, also like his siblings) he seems less and less like a baby to me. His mannerisms, the way he tries to copycat, the almost-walking...it all points to a BOY. My joyful, kissable, active explorer of a boy. And yet, on some level, always my baby. :)

Oh yeah, and the adults in our household (I'm no dummy. People only ask about us out of sheer obligation). On top of being the social coordinator for my three men-about-town I have taken a very part-time administrative assistant position. It's something I do from home and has been a perfect way to turn my thoughts away from Legos, diapers, and PBS cartoons once in awhile. I'm very much looking forward to a summer filled with plans to hang out with family and friends, vacation a bit (camping and Colorado, to name a few), and soak up time with my beloved boys (all 4 of them).

James has been keeping extremely busy with work and his role as treasurer for our new church (which finally has a name other than just "church plant". And that would be CenterPointe). He also remains an incredible husband, dad, son, and brother. I know he'd like to see a little more fishing and golf enter into the picture, so we'll see what summer brings him.

That's the haps here! Happy summer to you and a safe and restful Memorial Day!

Reminder

If things are quiet in the house, always always ALWAYS go in immediate search of Ben.

Yes, that is my mascara on his face and my toothbrush in his mouth.

Momma's Day Love

My mom has shown me by example that with God all things are possible as she has walked through some giant challenges and hurts in her life. She has a real, deep faith. She is a prayer warrior. She is gentle, patient, wise, kind, and genuine. She is a selfless wife, mother, and grandmother. She has become my friend as well as my mom and is one of the greatest blessings in my life.


My mom-in-law is the hardest working woman I have ever met and has passed on this trait to every single one of her children. She is endlessly giving and unconditionally loving, compassionate, tender, and godly. She has exemplified humility and contentment, and she gave me one of the most incredible, highly treasured gifts I've ever received: my husband.


Just a few of my incredible mommy friends/family who have taught me about life and parenthood (in no way a comprehensive list):

Robyn, who has taught me about making my kids my top priority but also about not giving up on my God-given identity, still pursuing my passions and interests, about always struggling to find that balance. Most importantly, who has taught me about keeping my eyes open to the world around me and challenging the status quo, to never settle.


Steph, who has truly been changed by the love of Christ, and is living out her faith authentically, powerfully modeling it for her children so that they can't help but be transformed by it. Who has taught me the joy of caring for my family and home and the equal joy of standing confidently in my identity as a woman of God. Who always listens, always prays.


Amy, who has shown me I am not alone in my struggles as a mom and wife but also that I am not a failure because I struggle. Who has encouraged me through her own life not to give up on pursuing Christ and to give to others selflessly.


Kris, who is showing me that we can temper the madness of motherhood with humor while also being real about the madness. Her authenticity and encouragement are more valuable to me than she probably even knows.


Aunt Joy, who has encouraged me to persevere because this too shall pass and who has truly been "great" to my children and me. :)


Jeni, Jill, and Ruth, truly my sisters, who have taught me about living in the moment, loving deeply, and staying true to myself.


Kara & Cathi, who have shown me the importance of just plain having fun with my kids and who have always had a listening ear (or email).


My grandmothers, who got this whole ball rolling. Who have clung to their faith through trials and triumphs, and who have given me years of their time and love. Who gave me my mom and dad, playing a pivotal role in who they are as well as who I am.


Jess, who has shown me how to embrace change in life fearlessly (even though sometimes we're scared spitless).


Trudy and Karen, who have taught me grace amidst the chaos of life and motherhood, and who so selflessly give.


Kathy, who has shown me how to put family first and know my limits, but who also so naturally finds ways to give of herself to others.


Jeanne, my "big sister" and dear friend. Who has stepped in and so willingly been there for my kids when I could not. Who models an unselfish and tireless love in caring for her husband and kids.

Happy Mothers' Day to these rockin' moms in my life and all of those who I neglected to mention. You ALL provide me with encouragement, support, and inspiration. My love to each one of you.

Mad Cow....Chicken, Pig, Soybean

I made the brilliant mistake last week of watching "Food Inc." on PBS. Brilliant because wowee oh wow did I need to have my eyes opened to what my family and I are actually ingesting. A mistake because now I have my eyes opened to what my family and I are actually ingesting. I question everything that goes into my mouth these days, wondering where it actually came from, how it was raised, etc. Do I still eat these questionable things? Well, yeah. I don't want to starve. But I of the iron stomach, who will eat (and very nearly have eaten) almost anything, find myself queasy as I pass by fast food restaurants and panicky as I peruse the grocery store aisles, wondering what's safe.
If you haven't been privy, yet, to this documentary, you're probably getting talked out of it right now. But don't. It is SO important to be aware of these things in our lives and I have put off this topic, amidst many others, basically because I'm lazy. It's tough to change. But I would rather be slightly inconvenienced and know that I am making healthier choices for myself and my kids. The synopsis of Food Inc. is basically that our food and the way it's raised are being determined by the almighty dollar. Giant fast food chains as well as a handful of manufacturers are monopolizing the food industry and have found ways to cut corners that are horrifying. Just one example: beef. Cows were designed to roam grassy fields, chewing their cud and naturally fertiziling the ground upon which they live (if you catch my drift). Instead, the powers that be have found that it's cheaper and quicker to corn-feed cattle and raise them in mass quantities upon flat expanses of muddy acreage. The short story here is that this has led to e. coli infestation in these animals. Rather than going back to the natural way of things, however, industry has instead found high tech ways of "cleaning" our meat before it finds its way into our burgers. One such way being meat "filler" that has been showered in an ammonia mixture. Grossed out yet?
In James's and my quest to become healthier and raise healthy kids we find that this food issue is not one we can ignore, especially having been educated by this film. I was outraged at how my food is being controlled and misused, and, darn it, I intend to do something about it. What, you may ask? Going organic is one way. I love stores like Trader Joe's who give me multiple options in this area. We also intend to start buying more local produce and livestock. I am ANXIOUSLY awaiting the start-up of farmers' markets in my area. If you live in the Chicago area check here or here for a list of local markets. I also hope to check out the Green City Market located downtown (which is year-round - woohoo!). We also are interested in things like fruit and veggie co-ops (still learning about those) and buying a cow. Seriously. Not to raise (though I'm tempted) but bought direct from a farmer and then butchered for us by a local butcher. It all sounds pretty extreme right? Well, extreme times call for extreme measures I guess. I know it probably means slightly more cost and time investment for us, but in the end I see it as worth it. Now, realistically, does this mean I will never again visit a fast-food chain or pick up produce at such-and-such grocery store? Of course not. But can I work to make changes, however small, to produce dividends of benefit for my family in the long run? You betcha.
Seriously, see Food Inc. All ignorance ever produces is more ignorance, and I refuse to believe that is truly bliss.