Good-bye 2011, helloooo 2012

Oh, what a Christmas break we had. And when I say "break" please read "massive rampaging flu virus". James has playfully dubbed it "Pukefest 2011". My, how we painted Western Michigan with our illness. Nana's house, Aunt Rachel's house, Minnie the Van. And our apologies to that Grand Rapids sidewalk and anyone who happened upon it. Never before has our family experienced such violent illness in such close proximity to one another or for so prolonged a time. What I have learned from this experience is this: I can't hack it. Don't get me wrong. In the midst of the crisis, I shine. I'll hold buckets, flush toilets, speak words of comfort, disinfect. But in the aftermath I have become a twitching germophobe who, at the sound of a forceful cough, spins into a mild panic. I regularly have flashbacks which clearly is evidence of post-traumatic stress disorder. In short, it's quite clear that our family has been blessed these many years with relative good health, and, oh dear Lord I pray, will get back on that track from here on out.

Enough of such talk.

It's a new year! In this new year I hope to take many more photos since I was graced this Christmas season with a new camera. That I guard now with my life. A few moments of the Christmas season that were vomit-free:

Some smiles, new gifts, and ugly sweaters later, we're ready for 2012!
Speaking of, I've been trying to take a few moments here and there in the midst of regrouping from break to reflect and project. I read over last year's questionnaire and feel some pangs of disappointment by my failure to grow but also feel a little warm and fuzzy remembering what a blessed year our family had filled with good times. Anyhoo, without further ado....

LOOKING BACK ON 2011~
1)What accomplishments from the past year are you most proud of?
Our family has started living a healthier lifestyle: being more active, eating more natural foods. While it's not a done deal, we're on the right track. I have also discovered and begun using my "no" muscle. :)
2) What did you learn about yourself this last year?
I have either an atrophied or a non-existent "no-muscle". I'm SUCH a people-pleaser! And God has been showing me that the only One I need to be living to please is Him. That's hard to flesh out in day-to-day living as I still have the uncontrollable urge to always say "yes" and never want to feel like I'm letting others down.
3) In what ways have you grown?
That's a painful question. It seems I can only look back and see the ways in which I took a step backward in all areas of my life. I guess I have taken steps forward in not being such a doormat and being able to put my family's needs first. Small. baby. steps.
4) What were the high points of the past year?
Vacation/wedding celebration with 16 friends in the Dominican Republic in February, Jeran starting first grade and Ben starting preschool, camping trips, joining a triad (for all you familiar with the church world, think small groups but smaller), time with friends & family, joining a gym (and actually using the membership, by the way), exciting things happening with/in our church family.
5) Low points?
Christmas marred by the stomach flu, not opening myself up fully to God's work and leading in my life, impatience and anger ruling my emotions, friends struggling or in pain
6) What inspiration will you carry forward into the year ahead?
"If we confess our sins, he is faithful and just and will forgive us our sins and purify us from all unrighteousness." 1 John 1:9
"...for he satisfies the the longing soul, and the hungry soul he fills with good things." Psalm 107:9
7) How would you complete this sentence: 2011 was the year of...
struggling to find balance. We are in this place even now. Always trying to be involved, reaching out, growing in relationships, and yet making sure our family is not short-changed on time together, particularly when it comes to our kids. Finding balance in leading healthy lives also.
8) Pick 3 words to describe 2011.
Fun, Loud, Exhausting
9)What were the best books you read this year?
Unbroken by Laura Hillenbrand, Hunger Games series, A Voice in the Wind by Francine Rivers, Crazy Love by Frances Chan, Surrender:The Heart God Controls by Nancy Leigh DeMoss
10) How did you grow in your relationships?
Made some new friends, grew deeper with some existing friends; I feel closer to my husband and more aware of who my kids are as people.
11) What was your single biggest time waster?
This year it was Netflix and its back-episodes of Grey's Anatomy. Yikes, that's embarrassing to admit.
12) What was the best way you used your time this year?
Those stretches of time when I was exercising and eating right. Anytime I spent in the Word and prayer, particularly when I started my day that way. (Cop-out! This was last year's answer. But it holds true this year too.) Also, spending time with James and the boys, my extended family, and all of the amazing girlfriends God has placed in my life.

GOING FORWARD~2012
1) What are you most looking forward to in the year ahead?
Walking more closely with the Lord, how He will use me in the lives of friends and neighbors
2) What do you want more of in the year ahead?
Peace, growth, health
3) Less of?
Pessimism, debt, unhealthy choices, anger
4) What relationships will you invest more of yourself in this year?
My neighbors
5) In what ways would you like to see yourself grow?
Surrender to God's will over my own, exhibiting patience with my boys, being able to say no at the right times without guilt
6)What are you choosing to let go of this year?
My anger, my need to have all the answers and know the next steps, my will, fear
7) How would you complete the following sentence~This will be the year of:
healthy choices! less spending! surrender!
8) If you had to choose a verse for the year ahead what would it be?
I'm not sure about a verse, but I feel God continues to bring before me the word "surrender". I suck at this, not to put too fine a point on it. I am very selfish in what I desire and very reluctant to 100% hand over the reins to the one who I know, ultimately, reigns. (Cute huh? :) ) I hope at this point next year I can look at my life and truly say that HE is the one who controls it.

I hope the first 9 days of this new year have treated you well. And if that's not the case then I pray that you have found yourself trusting the One who is in ultimate control. May 2012, for all of us, be a year of growth!