The Great Train Adventure

Now that a few hours have passed, I can look upon this afternoon as an adventure (as so stated in the title of this post) and not as a panic attack-inducing foray into my worst nightmares. Let's start with the sad fact that my mom had to return home this afternoon. She was an incredible help to us this week and spoiled all of us in countless ways. I cannot thank you enough, Mom! Her journey home was to take place via train, so we loaded up Minnie the Van to bring her to Union Station downtown. Generally, making a downtown Chicago trip is no biggie to me. I love the city and feel pretty confident with my driving skills (although, Mom, I saw you white-knuckling it a few times during our trip today - sorry about that. :-) ), and I knew we wouldn't have to get out of the car at any point in time, so I didn't think twice about this trip. After 12 years of living in the greater metropolitan area of Chicago, you'd think I would factor in the given that is rush hour traffic. You would also think that I'd be smart enough to know before leaving the house not only the exact way I'm taking TO my destination but also how to get home FROM it. Since neither of these genius notions crossed my synapses I entered the city limits today in the worst possible condition I could be in - unprepared.
The ride down was fairly uneventful. Traffic was a little heavier than I would have anticipated at the 3:30/4:00 hour, but we successfully navigated our way to Union Station and bid our reluctant farewells to "Nana"...amidst Jeran's sudden declarations that he had to use the potty. Of course. He was told he had to hold it. No sooner had we pulled away from the curb than Grayson began stirring. Following on the heels of his increasing cries for food was the realization that I didn't actually know where I needed to go to get back on I-55. I, who so pride myself on my sense of direction, then spent 15 minutes driving around essentially the same city blocks, now clogged with taxis, buses, and pedestrians, feeling my panic mount as Jeran continued to insist upon his need for a bathroom. At the same time, Grayson had launched into a full-scale infant wail to remind me that he was flippin' starving! Ben decided at this time to chime in with his own cries of hungry protest about being held captive in his car seat. This was the moment my husband called to check in, and I did what comes naturally to me in these times of stress - burst into tears. While talking me through the way home, James also insisted that I pull over somewhere safe and attend to the pressing needs of our kids before trying to make my way home blinded by tears and frustration. Right. Pull over in the middle of the city and drag 3 kids age 4 and under to a potty and a place to nurse. James suggested finding a self-park garage in which to nurse Grayson and digging up a container of some sort for Jeran to let loose in (an option my mom had also offered up). When I felt confident that I knew where I needed to go to get home, I did just that. Jeran thought it was pretty hilarious to pee into an empty McDonalds' sundae cup (none of you will now look at ice cream the same again) although we both started getting nervous when the cup reached it's almost-full point before he tapered off. Breathing a sigh of relief that that issue was taken care of, I turned my attention to a completely red-faced, screaming infant. Now the only child not having his needs attended to was Ben. Did I mention I ventured out on this trip unprepared? For my child whose love for food very nearly rivals my own, I had nothing to offer, so to keep him happy I (again, at the suggestion of my brilliant hubby) released him from his car seat so he could happily wander the full 3 feet of space that our van offers as a walking area. After about 15 minutes I cut off Grayson's feeding session, thinking that it should be sufficient to get us home, buckled everyone back into their seats, got rid of the offensive McDonalds' cup, and turned toward home. A fat lot of good that side trip did me. As soon as we pulled onto the parking lot...er, expressway I mean...everyone started melting down again. What could I do except pray hard, block out as much of the noise as I could, and steel myself for a nightmarish trip home. In fairly short order everyone settled down and after James directed me to some safe backroads to get me home, we arrived back home a mere 3 1/2 hours after we had left it. It goes without saying that I have learned from this experience (for one thing always ALWAYS always carry snacks and a complete map!). I also feel that my first trial by fire as a mom of 3 kids is behind me. I survived it. I will survive what's to come. And Mom, to you I say, quit beating yourself up about this whole incident! But if you MUST assuage any feelings of guilt you should know I am a big fan of drinks that include both caffeine and chocolate. :-) Kidding. SERIOUSLY stop feeling bad.